Sinfully Easy (and decadent) Sticky Buns

Let’s take a trip into the depths of my mind. Oh look-some landmarks! There’s Dirty Joke Caverns-right over Shakespeare River, and to the left you’ll see Memory Lane lined with trees made of Random Facts. Cute, right? Well there’s a building over there in Vegan City called “Accidentally Vegan.” That is where things like Oreos* and Bakers’ Chocolate live. “Accidentally Vegan” things come into existence when the manufacturers said, “wait…we didn’t put milk in those? Oh, screw it.” Among these wonderful “Accidentally Vegan” morsels lies Pillsbury Crescent Rolls.

Don’t believe me? Google it. The Dough Boy and I dare ya.

So today I needed to make a dessert for my family and I knew I had Pillsbury Crescent Rolls and no vegan chocolate to speak of. NO VEGAN CHOCOLATE?! Yeah, I was horrified too. Until…..a brilliant idea popped into my mind and you know what I made?! Well I guess the title of this post sorta gives it away but SINFULLY EASY STICKY BUNS! (I could make so many dirty jokes right now….)

Introducing.....deliciousness

You will need the following:

1/4 cup margarine

1/3 cup chopped nuts (pecans or walnuts)

1/4 cup brown sugar

2 tablespoons maple syrup (Grade B is always best but in a pinch, use what ya got)

An 8 ounce can of Pillsbury Crescent Rolls

1 tablespoon sugar

1/2 scant teaspoon cinnamon

1/2 scant teaspoon nutmeg

The Procedure

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F. Place the margarine and nuts into a 9inch cake pan. Toss it in the oven for 3 minutes (margarine should be melty but not melted. It shouldn't all be liquid.) Stir brown sugar and maple syrup into the margarine and nuts. Spread the mixture evenly throughout the pan.

Remove dough from can, do not unroll or separate (keep it in a log). Use a serrated knife (or sharp regular knife, but only if you know what you're doing) to cut the log into 8 rounds of dough. Mix together the sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg and pour onto a small plate. Take the rolls and dip both sides into the sugar mixture. Arrange the dough in the pan in the shape of a flower with 7 petals (look at the pictures if you're confused). Remember, the dough will swell up in baking so make sure the dough isn't touching yet.

Sprinkle any remaining sugar mixture over the buns and then put it all in the oven for about 20 minutes (the rolls should be golden brown and puffy when done.)

They'll look like this splendid photo!

Cool for 1-2 minutes and invert the pan over a plate. Now the gooey nut mixture is your topping! Magic, I know. They're best served warm but fine at room temperature too. Enjoy!

*Don’t eat Oreos in England cuz they put some sort of pig fat into the frosting. Don’t ask me why. They’re British, those people call the trunk of a car a “boot” out loud! That doesn’t even make sense….