Chocolatay Mousse (You Won't Believe it's Vegan)

So you know when you're walking to your cousin's wedding, see a girl on the street and think, "trashy bitch." Only to get to the wedding to have that same girl intoduced to you as the maid of honor? No? Just me? Well then...take that to heart because it's a damn good lesson about first impressions. You're welcome. 

Anyhoo, this mousse is sorta like that. In that you get that terrible first impression by reading the recipe, thinking, "what the hell is she thinking? Typical vegan," And then you'd be wrong. So wrong. So so so so wrong I can't even type enough "so"s.

There's a reason I added the electric fire thingy.

sososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososososo very wrong! 

I think you get the picture. This is damn good shit, like when you have a sweet craving and don't wanna, well, get fat-this is the solution for you. Avacados are often called the "ABC" fruit (though they're technically a berry-who knew?) because they have like every vitamin imaginable in them. They also have a bunch of fiber-which not only burns fat(ish) but....well....it's why old people eat prunes. Let's just say that.

Sorry about the potty-humor right before introducing something

so brown and gooey but it felt necessary

So right here on the inter-webs, live from Virginia, we have our very own three-ingredient succulent mousse that will break the STRICTEST of diets without making you gain! (that's just theatrics. Don't sue me if you get fat.)

VEGAN CHOCOLATE MOUSE!!!!!!

You will need the following:

One ripe avocado

3 tablespoons honey (or agave nectar if you're THAT kind of vegan)

3 tablespoons special dark/dutch process cocoa (it HAS to be b-l-a-c-k BLACK for it to be good. You'll thank me later)

A blender (we're lucking and have a VitaMix ;) I highly recommend it)

The Procedure

Put everything in the blender and blend until it's all blended together and looks all blendy.

Chill for at least half an hour (but it's cool if you lick the blades clean, I know I did (shhhh don't tell anyone. My weakness is embarrassing))

Serve with something pretty like chopped nuts or a mint-leaf garnish

P. S. This really only serves one so if you intend on sharing/having seconds then double or triple the recipe but don't do more than triple on one batch. :) 

No go forth and delight in your indulgence!

*nosh*